Get Help Without Ruining Relationships

Asking Has Drawbacks

A few months ago, I concluded that the best way to get help is to ask as many people as possible, but attitudes have shifted.

More effective is talking about challenges without the expectation of a solution. If they can, folks will naturally try to help. If not, there’s no pressure. That’s the key. Pressure. When people feel put upon, they may try to help, but it’s from a place of obligation. It benefits nobody in the long run.

Another helpful approach is to add an opt-out clause. Adding phrases like:

“Either way, I appreciate it”

or

“We’re good no matter what”

So there’s no sense that the entire relationship is riding on this.

People like to help.

Not used.